Have you ever had a forbidden lover? They may provide excitement, but no enrichment. They may provide goosebumps, but they aren’t good. They may give you some satisfaction, but no stability or security.
There are so many types of love, but the forbidden is the most dangerous. Why? Because you know that person has no place in your life… Now to be clear, I am not talking about forbidden love in the normal sense of what we consider forbidden. I don’t mean people trying to keep you apart or the excitement of a lover that you just can’t have… I am talking about the hidden, subtle dangers and characteristics of a person who is not in your best interest at all… Characteristics that are not so straightforward in the beginning but are revealed over time. I am talking about the Forbidden Lover that your own soul & spirit don’t want you to have. Here are a few examples.
Dishonest people are never the type of people you should be relationship with. You may catch them in untruths, but they always have a seemingly viable excuse. And they are good at it… These people are usually cheaters as well, and will display jealousy and make false accusations on you because of their own foolishness. If you can’t trust the person, what do you really have? Nothing. There really isn’t much to be said about liars. They don’t need to be in your life, at all.
Pimp- Like People:
This is when you are in a relationship with a person who is with you ONLY for a particular reason whether it be; sex, money, business connects, your comfy home, or anything other than just genuinely liking & loving you. They are selfish people that only care about gratifying their needs, not yours. This person will usually only do the bare minimum to get what they want from you. When you stop putting out (whatever it is), they move on to the next victim. Be wise enough to know if someone is with you for YOU or for what you have to offer.
Too Eager Beavers:
This refers to people that are quick to trade their current partner for you. Jumping from one relationship into another one is never a good idea. People need time to think, contemplate and just be alone for awhile before attempting to connect intimately with someone else. There is a major danger in someone who is willing to put their current partner aside, for the next new thing. This person is also selfish. You might be amazing and fantastic true enough, but that’s not what they see (even though they lavish you with compliments). They just want something other than what they have. And very often they will return to the very person they left you for, especially if it happens too fast. This type of person usually has relationship ADD and may get bored fast, so guess what? They will trade you for next one that sparks their fancy. Get into relationship with someone who is ready (unattached), willing (not a commitment-phobe), and able (emotionally sound) to stick for the long-haul. You need someone who is free and clear to truly enjoy getting to know you, inside and out.
Subtle Snakes are people who will wound you verbally, emotionally and mentally, at a very slow pace. It can be in the form of a ‘snide’ comment here or, a little ‘put down’ there. Its fun to crack jokes on each other and have a humorous repertoire, but it’s entirely another when a person makes you feel low. It’s a form of control. It’s like a slow drip of poison. Little by little they break you down, and you are left wondering what happened to your self esteem, dignity, and peace. They make you feel like everything is your fault, that you are over-reacting, or that you are being ridiculous… When in fact they have exercised this form of abuse on you (and others) for a long period of time. Truth sometimes does hurt, but it should always be spoken with love. No one is perfect, and your partner may point out some flaws, but you should never feel as if you’ve been beaten up after a truthful conversation.
These are the people with the continuous problems and issues. They never ask how your day is, what you feel, what you need, etc. They are too busy talking about themselves. You are their listening ground and shoulder to cry on. They will bring you down with their negative energy and depressive attitude. They don’t want to get out of their funk because they are too busy feeling sorry for themselves and playing the victim. Everyone has issues from time to time, but no one should be a therapist 24/7. Deal with your drama and get healthy so that you can be with someone who is ready to be joyous and happy.
Everyone is entitled to privacy but secrets can kill. These are people who never talk about themselves or share their story. They will ask all of your business and even appear to be good listeners. It is simply because they don’t want you know anything about them. I have found that these people may even have double lives and if you looked in their closet you would see skeletons galore. Its OK to have a hint of mystery but a person’s whole life should not be a mystery to you when you are in relationship. People that are not open with you after a reasonable period of time are usually hiding some things… You want a good, honest conversationalist, who likes to listen AND share.
So these are just a few Forbidden Lovers. I call them lovers because you can find yourself involved with any one of these people to your own detriment. You may overlook these things because there are other seemingly good qualities about them. They can appear extremely romantic, likeable, exciting and charismatic, however the very things on this list can destroy your heart, mind, body and soul. Take stock and pay attention to the people you choose to spend your time & energy on. If there is a gut feeling that something isn’t quite right, It’s probably because they are forbidden, and your spirit is warning you.
If you have any to add, please do.
Source: Engaging Epiphanies